Here i am, 2.55 am in the morning. I cant go to sleep thinking that after roughly a week, im single again. I wonder, why the hell am i holding on. After i thought about it much, there's the answer, i love her. You don't give up on someone you love, but she's facing difficulties no one could understand other than herself. I understand her. I worry so much for her and i dont even know why. Do i love her that much? My mind is never at peace knowing she's not happy, she's upset, angry, paranoid, depressed, despaired. And the worst part is, there's nothing i can do to help. Im useless. I've failed my mission to make life easier for my loved one, to make her trust me, to make her happy. Are we even meant to be? I leave it up to Allah. If we're meant to be, we will be. Whatever it is, I'll never stop loving you, no matter what happens, breakup? break apart? break off? break down? I'm still loving you. Seriously speaking i don't know whats wrong with me, why am i loving you so much, so deeply. You said it yourself, you're no different from the others. But that's something that i'll never agree to no matter how many times you said it. She's love. I'm not giving up on her. I'm not backing out. I'm not giving up. I'm not quitting. I believe so much we'll make it. Nothing can change that either than Allah. I'm still holding on, I still believe there's hope. No matter how many times i fail to make you trust me, I'll keep on trying. Yes, i love you that much. I really do. I meant it when i said I'm serious about us.
